Thursday, September 29, 2011

Cry to Heaven

Last month I mentioned that I was reading Ann Rice's Cry to Heaven. I've finished the book and I enjoyed it very much. Without spoiling the plot, the book is set in eighteenth century Italy and centers around castrati opera singers. Castrati are men who were castrated as boys to preserve their treble singing voices. They were the musical superstars of their age. Of course, the practice was barbaric, particularly as it was practices on boys without their consent. While a few of the castrati were successful opera stars, they were treated like freaks and less than men.  Rice, as usual, writes an enjoyable novel about difficult subjects. The castrati may not have testicles, but they are sexually active. Her main character, Tonio, has a series of sexual affairs, mostly gay.  Rice's main characters are usually supernatural and we travel through the book learning how they deal with their situation. In this case, Tonio is not supernatural and his situation is forced upon him. He must craft his own destiny. I'd highly recommend Cry to Heaven.

Is there a tie to chastity as I practice it? Well, perhaps a bit. Tonio is castrated against his will but is still sexually active. I've chosen to limit my sexual activity. I guess our true sexual organ is the brain.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Nocturnal Erections

I find it amusing that wearing a cb makes me aware of my nocturnal erections. It's like being a teenager again. Just my body dealing with excess production. Had at least two last night; I must need to shoot a load. I was dripping too. The last one happened when I was half awake waiting for the alarm clock. I could feel my cock start to harden and my pulse rate quicken. It was kind of strange to feel the action that I didn't have any control over.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Why?

Don't know why I'm feeling philosophical, maybe the Raisin Bran is working. Anyway, I've been thinking about why I and other people are using chastity devices.

If you have been wandering around the various web sites for chastity, it's rather clear that chastity is primarily a heterosexual fetish. Even if you account for the proportion of straights vs. gays in the general population, chastity seems to be much more popular among straight couples. I haven't seen one straight single male into chastity on the web. I suppose that chastity games are well suited to couples (locked male and female keyholder) whereas the demographics among gay men are different (fewer couples to start). I find it particularly interesting that chastity is almost exclusively used to reverse power roles in straight couples. The husband gives control of his penis to the wife. Practitioners claim a more attentive husband and a more interesting, if less frequent, sex life.

There are gay couples that use this model, too. But I would guess that the majority of gay men using a chastity device are operating on a different model. If they are a couple, the use of chastity is not a tool for rearranging their sexual roles. It's more likely to be just one part of an existing dom/sub relationship. But it looks to me like many, if not most, gay cb wearers are single, relationship-wise: they are self-locked or they have a keyholder with whom they have relationship limited to chastity issues.

I admit that I'm postulating here based on cursory web browsing, but straight chastity is more relationship-based whereas gay chastity is more likely to be tied directly to sexual activities (dom/sub, S/M).

Well, back to me (of course). What am I doing in a cb6000s? Why am I voluntarily experiencing fewer orgasms? Why do I put up with less-than-gentle nighttime erections at 4 AM? For crying out loud, I sprayed urine all over myself and the bathroom when I tried to stand to take a leak at my Mother's house last weekend.

I'll willingly admit I'm a masochist and a submissive. I don't know if it's my Catholic upbringing or just part of my sexual wiring. I kind of enjoy those nocturnal erections. And I can really attest to "absence makes the heart grow fonder." When I could masturbate at will, it would become almost routine, like brushing my teeth. Well, more fun than that. (But I'll spare you comparisons to other bodily functions.) I find wearing a cb is frequently stimulating. As with the average male, I have sexual thoughts many times a day and my plumping cock will be gripped by my cb. Nice. I'll stand at the sink and bump into the counter. Slight smile. I'm wearing a chastity device on my cock and balls! Kinky. Talking to people and wondering what they would say if they knew. KINKY! Wondering if they can see the bulge? Priceless.  I wore my cb for about two months on and off and then took two weeks off while I went away on vacation. I couldn't wait to put it back on.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Use It or Lose It

A blog friend (Chastity Journal on Being Caged - see listing on the right) has experienced no erections after changing to a birdlocked silicon device. He loves the new device and wonders if it is so effective that he no longer gets erections. Of course, the test will come when he takes it off.

I'm still getting erections, albeit stymied. I had one last night and one reading some porn this morning.

When I wore my device for a week or more, I found that when I took my cb6000s off, the feeling was so strange, it took some tactile stimulation to get the erection I so missed. It was like my body had forgotten how to get an erection. It all came back to me in minutes, but I wonder if the effect will last longer if I am I am locked for a longer period of time than two weeks, my last lockup. I would have guessed that I would have trouble taking my cb off with a growing hardon, but I didn't have one immediately. My poor penis felt small and slightly cold and damp, like I had just found it under a rock. And smaller than I remembered.

Even when I got hard, it seemed a bit smaller than before. I don't know if it's true or just the fact that I got used to a big hunk of hard plastic between my legs. Everything worked and it did feel good, very good, but like a muscle in a cast, it may take some physical therapy to get back to par.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Well, Maybe Not

Tough night, I was up three times with erections that were crushing my poor balls. I tried to piss but it came so slowly. The last was at 6 AM so I got up. Just a phase, I know.

I've been reading various blogs and discussion boards and I am interested in how men wearing chastity devices perceive their penis after they have been locked up for a while, after being locked has become routine.

Some men describe a "null" feeling--they no longer fell like they have a cock--just a piece of metal or plastic between their legs. Others describe a more organic feeling. They still feel their cocks but their device has become a part of their body, maybe as part of their cock, albeit one that restricts access and pleasure.

I can't say that I have the experience to agree with one or the other. The longest I've been locked is just over two weeks.

What's your experience?

Friday, September 23, 2011

Surprisingly Easy

I was afraid that after 2+ weeks out of my cb, I'd have to start over again in acclimating to the device, but I got back into the groove without problems (so far). My biggest problem is a nasty eye infection (pink eye). Ugh!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Back Home

Back from my trip to Europe (Rome, Malta and Ireland). I had a good time but I'm glad to be back in my own bed. I'm planning to go back into my cb tomorrow and going for a month lockup.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011


A street in Mdina, Malta. A very beautiful city on a stunning island nation in the middle of the Mediterranean.  Very medieval here. You can imagine chastity belts being forged here. (But probably used only on women.)

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

See ya!

I'm otta here. 2 weeks. Vacation. I'll try to check in but I'm not exactly staying at the Ritz in Silicon Valley, if you know what I mean.

Hey, watch your brother while I'm gone. I'm holding YOU responsible.  ;-)

Sunday, September 4, 2011






Happy Labor Day Weekend. I think we need this.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Packing

I'm getting ready to go on a two-week vacation in Europe. Yea! I have taken off my cb because I have relatives/visitors who are joining us for our vacation, we're already sharing a bathroom and I'm not going to start explaining my chastity device to my sister-in-law. So, it's off and I do miss it. I've noticed that when I take it off, I feel much smaller.